Lord, I know You’ve heard my cries for “more.” But honestly I’m not sure what more even looks like, let alone how to apprehend it. But I do know You. And I know You still have my yes. You still have my trust. If I need to believe hard enough, pray long enough, declare loud enough, or hold on tight enough to anyone or anything other than You–this thing is all over. I can’t do it. But I CAN keep holding onto You, and I suspect that is what You really want anyway.
Abba, You are the Promise Giver AND the Promise Keeper. You aren’t just the One who gives and fulfills promises, You are the One who “keeps” them in between. You keep them safe in the waiting. Including Your promise for more. I am not the promise keeper–I never have been and I never will be–You are. Only You. I hold onto You–You hold onto the promises.
Right now, I can’t do anything stronger, harder, better, but what I can do is keep showing up. I can keep saying yes. I can keep trusting. If there is something or somewhere I need to be more, or do more–show me. I desperately want to know. But until then, I’m going to hold on by showing up. I’m going to hold on by trusting. I’m going to trust You for more by trusting You to BE more…
More than I can hope or imagine.